Bat Shit Law of the Day: Ban Karma

So Arizona has decided to take action because apparently Secret Terrorist Muslims are taking over the United States, and they are the only ones who notice. Like Arizona, Tennessee has moved forward to ban Shariah Law. Following the Conservative Ideology that all things created/looks like something from the Middle East they will ban it; Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, Indiana, Mississippi, Arkansas, Louisiana, Texas, South Dakota, Nebraska, Wyoming, Utah, and Alaska have all put forth legislation to ban Shariah Law. To be honest I haven't seen Shariah Law in the U.S. But I also think Ronald Reagan was a fuck up as a President. Just obvious things I've noticed that Conservatives haven't.

I digress, Arizona is taking this a step further. Not only will they ban Shariah Law but they will ban the concept of Karma. Really? Karma? Karma isn't even a religion. what bad has come from Karma? It is the idea that the act of Good Deeds lead to Good Results, and Bad Deeds leads to Bad Results. How can you not believe in something like that? Isn't that the whole predication of Christianity (if you are good you go to heaven, if you are bad you go to hell)? Does that mean killing someone now no longer leads to the victims death because Karma has been abolished?



Arizona has to be the most ass backwards state. And the fact that I can seriously say it is worse than South Carolina, or Alabama is sad. At least in Alabama or South Carolina we expect ass backwardsness. But this takes the cake.

Once again Conservatives can't have their ideology without making you fear someone.

If we are banning things we are scared of I have a few bills I would like to bring to the floor.

1. The V.I.K.I. Law


The purpose of the V.I.K.I. law is to ban all Personal Servant Robots. Reason is, is that the robots are becoming too strong, and one day they will rebel. And unless you were half bionic like Will Smith, we cannot defeat them. Therefore I don't want to risk being taken over by Robot Servants.

2. Ban of the Hitler Stache


With "His Airness" rocking the Hitler last year, I fear that the Hitler will come back in style, and someone will take it too far, and try to run for President under the Nazi Party. So from this day forth Hitler Stache = Banned.
You know you were a pretty screwed up guy when you have a unique mustache, and you were so awful that the mustache you had is not acceptable in public. If only John Stockton was Hitler then we could ban the short shorts instead.

3. Ban Killer Tomatoes

Saw this movie. Frightened me to death. Now my tomatoes only come in Ketchup form. Therefore if I had a Killer Tomato, it has already been defeated. So no more killer tomatoes.

4. Banishment of Eddie Murphy

We shall ban Eddie Murphy from America, or at least Brooklyn. I suspect he may be a Vampire. Do you want to take that risk? And Kadeem Hardison that goes for you too.

5. Mutant Turtles

Imagine what the terrorists could do with Radiation, Turtles, and a New York City Rat. If they get a hold of this combo we could be fighting Stoned Mutated Martial Arts Fighting Turtles. We have a great army but I think mutated turtles have us beat.